Q: What do I do when my baby wishes to be held all the time and cries when put in a chair or on a play mat?
A: Being held causes the routine and expectation of being held, even in infancy. Breaking the habit can be a challenge and needs a lot of persistence and perserverance. Begin by puting the infant down, either in the bouncy chair or on the play mat. Stay nearby and have fun with your baby. Start with just a few minutes and try to select the baby up prior to he starts weeping. Learn to inform the signs of your baby becoming dissatisfied so you can select her up before the weeping starts. If you wait until she is sobbing you are reinforcing that “weeping gets me picked up”.
Do this multiple times each day when the baby is happy and well rested. Gradually extend the quantity of time that you leave the child in the backyard and begin to use toys as the source of home entertainment rather than you. Have other members of your home do the exact same so the baby will find out that it is all right to be put down no matter who is holding them. Toys with contrast (black and white) benefit young babies; mirrors and toys that make sounds or have flashing easy work well with older infants. After a few days to a week you need to see a modification in your baby’s determination to be put down and capability to amuse himself for brief periods of time.
Q: My 3-week-old boy wishes to be held all the time. I cannot put him down without him crying within a few minutes. He sleeps with me in the evening, however only naps throughout the day if somebody is holding him. Any tips?
A: As hard as it can be for brand-new parents who simply want a few minutes to themselves, the reality is that very young babies frequently choose being held to other position. This makes sense from an evolutionary viewpoint– staying near your source of food and defense is in fact quite smart.
When you hold your kid, he feels your body warmth and hears your heartbeat, a sound familiar from inside the womb. He smells your fragrance. When you snuggle him, he feels safe; it reminds him of the great old days back inside your belly. Plus, the closer he is, the most likely he is to receive your caresses and kisses.
But what can you do to obtain the breaks you need? Some parents find that a baby carrier or sling is a great compromise. They permit you to carry baby with you while you get things done around your house. My child was a lot like your child, and I keep in mind admiring the fact that even as I bobbed up and down while dumping the dishwasher, she never made a peep in the baby sling. This is likewise the time to call some of those individuals who provided to help with the baby– friends, family, neighbors, or a postpartum doula– to come over for an hour or 2 and hold your child while you shower, return emails, run errands, or simply take a much-needed nap.
Because your son sleeps with you during the night, he is most likely pretty used to going to sleep beside another warm body. So as far as his napping goes, you can either let him go to sleep in the baby provider, or you can help him begin learning how to sleep on his own. Attempt swaddling him, to imitate the sensation of being held, and then putting him down. Stay with him and rock him, sing, or stroke his face or hand until he calms down. Babies this young simply do not have the ability to calm themselves yet, so it is essential not to let him “sob it out.”
It will take some time for your child to learn to fall asleep on his own; it’s an ability he will invest the majority of his first 6 months (to a year) learning. So be patient, look for aid when you require it and, even as you fantasize about an entire 30 minutes alone, bear in mind that these early days and months fly by really quickly. Prior to you know it, your boy will learn how to crawl and walk, and you’ll be running to catch up with him!